The authors of the 2005 bestseller “Freakonomics” noted that the 1973 Roe vs. Wade decision accurately forecast that the crime rate would dip starting 15 years later. Presidents Bush the Elder (1989-93) and Clinton (1993-2001) both pushed expensive and extensive tough on crime legislation which they trumpeted as successful when crime diminished — just as it was going to do anyway.
Demographers predicted the drop years before because most crime is committed by young men aged 15-25. There were simply less unwanted kids when Roe ruled. Despite the current political rhetoric, crime rates have continued to dwindle with one exception: bang bang. More and more efficient guns yield more people shot and killed. Quite efficient.
Even before Clarence and the homotextuals put the final nail in Roe’s coffin, abortion was impossible to obtain in much of the country.
It’s easier to buy a gun than it is to buy beer in the cowboy myth USA.
So who says the dismal science will bore you to death? I found economics a sleepy-class blast back at Fresno State. My enthusiasm resulted in my acing straight C’s.
Herewith, occasionally prescient political and investment advice. What?
You didn’t know the two murky pseudo-scientific disciplines were inextricably intertwined? I predict that you will read on.
RUBBING IT IN DEPT. I really should open the first-ever orthopedic, economic forecasting and private investigation firm. It would specialize in searches for one-armed economists who can never say “but on the other hand.”
Several times before last month’s electoral love fest, I predicted “gas prices will magically start dropping after election day as BigOil has done all it could to elect moonhowlers who will set in cement the Trumpista tax cuts for the corporately wealthy.” Retail gas prices dropped another 14 cents per gallon last week, adding to an 11-cent drop the week before.
THE CONFEDERACY WINS AGAIN. Gas prices have dipped below three dollars a gallon throughout the southeast. That certainly won’t help madcap Herschel Walker’s bid to run roughshod through the U.S. Senate.
AS DOES TOM BRADY, who led his Confederate-based football team to a comeback win Monday night. The GOAT announced his retirement last February 1 but I knew it would not stand. How did I know? God told me, at least the most powerful American deity after money: television.
The gods of the tube spoke thru closed-captioning on the most credible network (No, not Fox, dammit — PBS).
In a Feb. 23 Brady story, closed-captioning interpreted “a change of course” as “a greater baseball horse.” Message received. Quit the game? Neigh! The greatest of all time un-retired three weeks later. (Thank heaven Brady didn’t pull a Michael Jordan and try his hand with the Yankees.)
Experienced interpreters of the electronic tea leaves could have made money in both bar bets and sports books.
If you keep an eye on the irritating but all-knowing and ever-vigilant closed-captioning, the CC Goddess Cathode will tell you when to hold ‘em, when to fold ‘em, when to invest and when to cash out.
She called the latest southeast Reno Damonte Ranch development “The Money Ranch.” (KRNV TV-4 Aug. 17) Recommendation: From hold to buy.
On August 24, the BBC reported that U.S. primary election results would be “screwed eyes” (scrutinized) for clues about the November general election. Cockeyed would have been more appropriate, as the mainstream press and pundits from all points of the spectrum melted down when the Democratic meltdown never happened. It was a matter of skewed perspective, aka screwed eyes. Recommendation: Sell short.
In October, Channel 4’s computer system renamed Mar-A-Loco as Merrill Lago. Trump’s new investment manager, perhaps? He could use one. Sell.
Quick.
BATTLE SCARS: The BBC last month reported on Ukraine neighbor “Will More Dove” (Moldova). PBS noted that in Syria, Kurdish soldiers and civilians were “killed by attacks on 90 cents.” (90 sites). War is expensive either way.
Two-network international journalist and commentator Christiane Amanpour recently talked about some place called “Taijuan.” Taijuan? Is Tijuana now seeing business investment moving away from the proximity of China, be it Taiwan or Thailand? Call your stockbroker. If you make money, I will accept a modest finder’s fee.
On the other hand, I would protect myself against any investment in some new bakery product called “dill dough.” (Late Night/Colbert CBS Feb. 23) UNR undergrads we re-dubbed “you and our students.” True enough. TV host Jimmy Kimmel insulted comic actor David Spade as “a very fungi.”
I would thus rely on cc for neither medical nor directional advice. Just where is “North Bong 80,” near northbound I-80 perhaps? (KTVU/Oakland) If you’re stoned, don’t drive, especially if you’re looking for the annual Lake Tahoe classic boat show. The pretentiously titled Concours D’elegance became “Con cors de a gonz,” according to the gonzo gremlins in Channel 4’s system.
KOLO TV-8 occasionally reports on the “Washington County School District.” By the time this edition hits the streets, Washoe School District trustees will have selected a new member, very probably frontrunner Alex Woodley. I hope so, no matter how it’s spelled.
TEMPLE EMANU EL’S JOKE OF THE WEEK: “Three Wise Jewish Women.”
What would have happened if, instead of three wise men, it had been three wise women? Specifically, if it had been three wise Jewish women?
They would have asked directions, arrived on time, helped deliver the baby, cleaned the stable, made a brisket and brought practical gifts.
But what would they have said when they left?
“Did you see the sandals Mary was wearing with that shmatta-for-a-gown?”
“That baby doesn’t look anything like Joseph!”
“Can you believe that they let all of those disgusting animals in there!”
“I heard that Joseph isn’t even working right now!”
“And that donkey that they are riding has seen better days too!”
“Want to bet on how long it will take until you get your brisket dish back?”
Mazeltov!
Happy High Holly Days to you and yours.
Stay safe and pray for Ukraine and 53 other currently war-torn lands.
Be well. Raise hell. / Esté bien. Haga infierno.
Andrew Quarantino Barbano is a 54-year Nevadan and editor of NevadaLabor.com. Barbwire by Barbano has originated in the Tribune since 1988. E-mail barbano@frontpage.reno.nv.us
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