Joe doesn’t live here anymore

President Joe Biden will soon have his annual physical, but the White House spokesliar says it will not include a cognitive test. And, everyone knows why: Joe doesn’t live here anymore.

We know this beyond a shadow of a doubt in a number of different ways.

First, we see the decline. Even allowing for what his supporters incorrectly call his “stuttering” disability, he suffers severe senior moments more and more often. These pesky brain farts take shape in statements in which dead leaders are mistaken for live leaders, confusion of which countries border each other (Mexico borders Israel?) and “get-off-my-lawn” tantrums that look like he’s doing an impression of Homer Simpson’s dad yelling at clouds.

Secondly, we have an independent assessment from a third party – special prosecutor Robert Hur. He found the president so mentally feeble that bringing slam-dunk charges against him for willfully keeping and sharing top secret information would be dicy because the president can’t remember much and to establish “willful” would prove problematic.

After that brutal assessment, President Biden accused the special prosecutor of “gratuitous” comments about his mental acuity. For example, the special prosecutor noted that Biden could not remember even within several years when his son Beau died.

Biden said “how dare he” raise the issue of his dead son.

But, in fact, it wasn’t Hur who raised Beau’s death. It was Biden himself. And he couldn’t remember when it was.

Of course, there’s an easy way to settle this. President Biden could fight to release the full transcript of the Hur interview and put it all to rest. It’s on video tape. But he won’t do that and, again, we all know why.

Look, everyone can see that Joe Biden isn’t with us anymore.

This charade can’t hold to Election Day. I predict one of three things will happen:

Emperor Joe Biden

• Joe will slip and lose his bowels on national TV. Game over.
• Joe dressed in full parody of Star Wars Emperor Palpatine will go before the Democratic National Convention in a hologram and endorse Naboo Governor Gavin as the chosen one.
• He’ll make it to election day only to get trumped by Orange Yoda miraculously having returned from Dagobah.

That’s how I see it … and I’m stickin’ to it.

SPORTS BETTING

Remember when the relationship between sports and Nevada gamblers was awkward at best? I do. There was even a time when it was forbidden to bet on UNLV basketball home games, though everybody did.

Now we’re fresh off the Super Bowl played in Las Vegas and, my, oh my, have things changed. Sports betting and the NFL now hold hands to promote betting. And you can see why.

Nevada casinos, and by extension Nevada tax coffers, did phenomenal business over the Big Game’s weekend. The Nevada Gaming Control Board reports a record $185.6 million was wagered in Las Vegas on the Super Bowl. The 182 sportsbooks in Nevada held on to 3.7% of the total bet.

Not bad for one game.

TRANSPARENCY

Nevada State Controller Andy Matthews is one of Nevada’s elected officials that I really like. He made good on a campaign promise to make state spending more transparent. He’s created Checkbook.nv.gov and it gets people access to exactly what the state is spending money on.

Give it a try. Nice work, Andy!

ONE MORE THING

– People are so judgmental. I can tell by just looking at them.

(Sherman R. Frederick is a longtime Nevada writer and a member of the Nevada Press Association’s Hall of Fame. He can be reached at ShermFrederick@gmail.com.)