People come to my office with anguish and despair about their addicted loved one. Mothers, fathers, grandparents, siblings and friends – flailing, cruelly impaled by helplessness, like an insect on a pin. Bit by bit, piece by piece, they watch The Addict deteriorate, come apart, and sink ever deeper into the madness of addiction. And there is nothing they can do. Or so they … [Read more...]

They form a line across her adolescent and adult history, waiting their turn to love her. A guy in every port. A dapper dude in every office. Whichever way she turns, stands another man in love with her. Some are clunkers. But, a few have potential and, from time to time, she lets one stay for a while. She enjoys being loved. She bathes in the love. She sits like a queen, … [Read more...]

Never, not once, in my career have I ever told a couple to get married. Or to stay married. Or to get a divorce. Ever. And I never will. That part of the equation is none of my business. On the other hand, I do sometimes observe aloud to a couple that their reluctance to make a definitive commitment – to choose each other in words and constant deeds – might be exactly what’s … [Read more...]

According to the doctor, the man’s widowed father is dying. Probably six months. Though it could be eight. Or three. The man loves his father. He speaks of him with admiration, gratitude and good memories. He’s a lucky son. A son who knows his father’s blessing. He carries his father’s pride with … well, great pride. And all he wants now is to be a good son. A blessing to … [Read more...]

So, here’s a twist on New Year’s resolutions: Instead of making promises for change in the days ahead, take a minute and inventory things you learned and ways you changed in the year behind you. What became of you in the last 12 months? Progress? Regress? Inertia, or even stagnation? Did you add to arguments for hope, generosity and compassion? Or did you strengthen the case of … [Read more...]

I watch a lot of nature shows on television. Which is to say I know that, drop for drop, the venom of the box jellyfish is the world’s deadliest. And I know the great white shark has the most powerful bite force. And I know that, each year, no animal on earth is responsible for more human deaths than … the mosquito. I’ve amassed all kinds of fun facts over the years, … [Read more...]

Who can doubt the power of Christmas? If you are born and raised in Western Civilization, you cannot not react to the cultural tsunami surge of December 25th. Its drum beat is powerful and loud, a rhythm to which your soul will rock and sway even if you are keen to resist. The collective psychological reach of Christmas is vast, operating in virtual independence of its … [Read more...]