A friend sends me an advice column written by psychologist Karen Young from her blog Hey Sigmund. In the column, Young offers encouragement and advice to people in life partnership/marriage in a blended family. One or both partners bring children to the love affair. Complicated? Often! Impossible? No! Second-chance romance and marriage can, should and does often thrive. Let … [Read more...]
Justice Matters but Redemption Matters More
The older I get, the more I become certain of what I do not know. Here’s something I do not know: I do not know if my fierce passion about the subject of evil is learned or inherent. Sometimes I think the passion is a consequence of my history. My life experience. That the passion was/ is a spontaneous adaptation helping me to survive. I learned it, and that of necessity. I … [Read more...]
‘I’m Disappointed in You’
When I observe law enforcement and military service in the United States, the sheer swath, depth and breadth of options is impressive. It’s a continuum that begins with mere presence and ends with a thermonuclear strike. Presence. Visibility. Clear communications with the civilians. An understanding of the law that is at once clear, impartial and fair. Then questioning. … [Read more...]
What We Don’t Say at the End
Four years of my professional life were spent working in hospice. Director of Bereavement and Pastoral Care. Simply put, four of the best years of my life. Creative, energizing, and a daily learning curve. A downer? Absolutely not! Quite the opposite. More hopeful, inspirational, meaningful. I listened to the mortals in the bed. Talked to them. Was always struck by how … [Read more...]
It Was the Best I Could Do
Here comes The Speech. I can see it on his face. I can feel the words gathering in the air between us. One part plea, one part protest, one part lamentation. I’ve got The Speech memorized. I hear it in my office with some regularity. And not just in my office: I also hear it out and about from friends and colleagues. It’s as if, at birth, we each receive The Speech on a … [Read more...]
Remember the Fable of ‘The Fox and The Lion’
The woman is a wife of 14 years. She feels guilty, even as she tells me she has yet to do anything wrong. She feels guilty because she is drawn to the attention and desire of a man who is not her husband. The man notices her. Doesn’t merely greet her each day at work, but beholds her. As if he has been waiting for her to arrive. As if anticipating the moment they will … [Read more...]
The Sands of Love
On the shelf in my office sits – stands, really – a 5” action figure of Carl Gustav Jung. He is wearing a gray suit and black tie. His glasses are pushed up on his forehead. Carl is smiling. I acquired Carl The Action Figure on Christmas Day, a few years ago. Just reached into my stocking, and pulled him out. A nod from my younger sister, the licensed psychologist, told me … [Read more...]
Oh, That Alien Feeling Called Love
First love is a life-changing experience. It happens to most people in adolescence. I waited a bit longer, 23 years old when I, by way of introduction, hit a sunbathing Gamma Phi Delta with a Frisbee. Actually, my friend threw the fateful disc, he and I on a wide expanse of grass behind the chapel at Southern Methodist University, living large and youthful in the spring … [Read more...]